GUYS GIVE THE CRAZIEST REASONS THEY BROKE UP

1. I was dating a girl once who answered her phone while we were in a movie theatre. It wasn’t an emergency and it wasn’t a “sorry I’ll call you back!” hushed thing. It was just her straight up having a conversation on her phone in the middle of a crowded theatre. It infuriated me. Wasn’t even able to look at her the same after that.

2. I once almost dated a woman with my Mom’s first name. I couldn’t go through with it.

3. One upping everything, even negative points. ‘If you were bitten by a dog, then I was mauled by a bear’ kind of stuff.

4. My ex cited my dislike for mushrooms as one of the key driving factors in our hot mess of a breakup.

5. She was really pretty and nice and funny, but she pronounced breakfast as “breaf-ix”. Out of respect to breakfast food, I just couldn’t do it.

6. I was talking to a girl that I was starting to really like while I was at work.

She was complaining about how broke she was earlier that day. I eventually mentioned that I was really hungry but didnt have time to leave for lunch and she asked if I heard of Postmates. I hadn’t, and when I looked it up there was like a $20 delivery fee.

I told her that I’d pass on that and she told me that she was ordering sushi with them delivering. I said “But aren’t you still broke?” and her response was “I knowww but I couldn’t help myself.”

It sounds petty, but I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t have enough self control to at least go pick up the sushi and save $20

7. It wasn’t someone I was interested in, but one time I went putt-putt golfing with my sister and her then boyfriend. He bragged the whole way there about how amazing he was at putt-putt. Half-way through the outing we were both beating him and he was visibly upset by it. We got to a spot where we were ahead of him because of a bad shot he’d made. I turned around and caught him moving the ball to a better position when he thought we weren’t looking.

I never trusted him after that. How can you trust someone that would cheat at putt-putt? My sister did break up with him shortly thereafter.

8.Social media addiction. If she posts everything she does online and feels the need to document her whole life, I want no part of it. I’m talking extreme stuff. When she’s basically got an alter ego on Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook and Twitter.

9. When you’re in a serious conversation, and they start texting. I can’t be the only one who likes mutual attention when having a serious talk.

 10.Interrupting. Constant interrupting.

11. I only dated this girl for a couple months, but she posted a bit too much on Instagram and Facebook. Like photos of her hiking with a quote as a caption and “wildandfree” as a hashtag. Maybe it is just me, but that shit is a big turn off. I like someone who can appreciate things without having to push it in people’s faces.

12. I’ve posted this before but i dated a girl who straight up smelled like pancakes. I dunno if it was her perfume or her natural scent but it smelt just like pancakes. It took three dates before I cut it off. Couldn’t handle it. Told her I was going away for school. Sorry Jessica.

13. She never even bothered to offer to help with the bill. I went on 2 expensive dinner dates and realized she didn’t thank me for either of them too. She just expected me to pay for everything.

14. My ex constantly questioned me and thought i was “cheating” on her every time i replied late to her text messages. Im not cheating im just playing Overwatch and i forget to check my phone!

15.. My ex said she purposely didn’t like things because they were popular yet idolized Kim Kardashian, adores lil uzi, shops at urban outfitters and regurgitates relationship philosophy from 18 year old girls on twitter. Just because she is physically gorgeous does not mean she will always be attractive.

16. She kept saying things that didn’t make sense, like she was trying to sound smarter than she was. For example: “Is that even feasibly possible?” I cringe every time I remember that. The second time she said it I knew we were done.

17. She watched movies and would breathe really loudly through her nose and it would whistle while chewing or sit with her mouth open and suck air loudly. I couldn’t fucking take it. I just left.

18. I once stopped talking to a girl due to her poor spelling and grammar in text conversations. At first it wasn’t a big deal. I thought maybe they were typos, but no. At a certain point it dawned on me that this chick just couldn’t spell. Pretty much ghosted her after that. Not proud of it, but I did.

19. Smelt like roasted chicken. Hard to describe but she smelt like roasted chicken.


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